Consequences of a false start.
“‘And as for Ishmael, I have heard you: I will surely bless him; I will make him fruitful and will greatly increase his numbers. He will be the father of twelve rulers, and I will make him into a great nation. But my covenant I will establish with Isaac, whom Sarah will bear to you by this time next year.’”
(Genesis 17:20-21)
Have you ever been out in public and see someone waving excitedly at you? At least, you think they’re waving at you until you realize they’re actually waving at the person next to or behind you. ‘Grade A’ awkwardness right there. Jump now to the Bible, more specifically, the story of Abraham and Sarah’s promise from God, a child in their old age. I have heard sermons taught on the error of Sarai and Abram’s impatience or even the perspective of how God can turn our disobedience in our favor. But I have not heard a message from the perspective of Ishmael. I wonder what it felt like for him to know he was born to a mighty faith leader like Abraham, but also to know that his half-brother Isaac was the intended promise of God, not him. I never considered Ishmael’s feelings until my early twenties, when I first felt the ability to empathize. My parents were very young, right out of college, when both my sister and I were born. Growing up, I was very aware of how hard it was for them to raise young children while juggling post-grad life themselves. Even in terms of dating conversations, my mother made sure that my sister and I knew not to marry young because we couldn’t possibly know who we were well enough to be prepared. Of course, there is wisdom in that perspective. There is so much I am still learning at 23, 24, 25 years old. However, one day in church I realized that I had internalized the idea that my parents struggled as a direct result of my birth. I thought that I was such a burden that they would adamantly advise against anyone going down a similar path. Without them saying anything close, the devil had planted the lie. It was not until I sat still with God that He was able to show me the lies that had been planted in my spirit, and He began to combat each lie with His truth.
So, this entry is for those who have looked at the lives around you, and your life doesn’t look like people were intentional about your beginning. You may have been neglected or abused as a child and led to believe that your life is a burden. As you grew, that weed of a lie has grown with you but I thank God for the victory to destroy chains! The Bible says “‘For I know the plans I have for you’, declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you; to give you a hope and a future.” This means that while your Earthly family might have been surprised about your birth, the God of the universe had already cemented His plans for your life! He had already called you to be used for His purpose! He had already declared that “no weapon formed against you should prosper” and “every tongue that rises up against you shall be condemned.” Your God is so intentional about you, baby. Let that sink in! It’s the reason your life has been spared even in the mistakes you make, and even when you are not as intentional about God. Be encouraged! If you’re wondering what happened to Ishmael, God continued to provide for Ishmael and Hagar although they had moments when they turned to other idols. Be confident in this: God is faithful, and all He wants is a willing and repentant heart.
Journal today: What is God saying to me? What have I internalized about myself that goes against what He says about me? Where have I been responsible for creating “Ishmaels”?
Prayer:
God, thank you for being intentional about me. Thank you that you are never surprised or caught off guard. Nobody can love me like you. Please help me to understand my worth if I ever felt like Ishmael, and please forgive me for the times I have made someone else feel like Ishmael because I was too impatient to wait for your promise. I trust that you work all things together for my good. In Jesus’ name, amen.
