Iron sharpens iron…not kisses.
“As iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens another.” (Proverbs 27:17)
“Because the Lord disciplines the one he loves, and he chastens everyone he accepts as his son.” (Hebrews 12:6)
One day I came home to my super God-ordained, blessing of a roommate wanting to have a “talk”. I was nervous as my mind scanned all the possible things that could require such a conversation. From my point of view, everything was perfect and blessed. Not so. Instead, she proceeded to challenge me to “be a better steward of the blessing” we had believed God for- our apartment. She reminded me of my goal of being a wife in the future, and the diligence I would need to create a home environment that fosters peace for my future husband and children. She even challenged the times she heard me eating late dinners, suggesting that I might not complain of grogginess and a lack of energy if I were more disciplined in my eating.
Ideally, I would have blessed her and thanked God for her immediately. In a perfect world where I was mature and sanctified, sure. But truth be told, I immediately felt defensive! How could she bring my future husband into this?! So what if I didn’t do the dishes as soon as I got home every evening, my husband had better get used to chipping in. I had a list of mental rebuttals a mile long, but do you know what actually happened? The Holy Spirit convicted ME. He asked me, “is iron sharpening supposed to feel warm and fuzzy?” You see, I had considered our relationship a blessing from God Himself since day one. However, the moment she saw things in me that were hindering the manifestation of my best, I was ready to pack my bags.
God wants us to develop more longevity in the right kinds of relationships! Sure, it’s easy to be loyal and to love those who are our personal cheerleaders through life; to always be the smartest, most saved, most beautiful friend in the group. But what if God is calling you to more? More wisdom, more discipline, more maturity: it all requires a level of discomfort.
If you don’t believe me, think about your own life and walk with God. Do you grow more when God coddles you and reassures you that everything will be okay, or when He convicts you when you settle beneath His will? The Bible tells us that the Lord actually disciplines the ones He loves, and corrects the ones He accepts as sons. At first glance, neither of those appear to be loving. However, think of it like this: He loves me too much to allow me to live beneath what He has destined for me. He loves me too much to live my life according to the deception of my own desires. That is real parenting! God is not concerned with being your friend. He cares about you accomplishing your purpose.
Iron sharpens iron; if you are not feeling sharper as a result of your relationships, it’s time for a shift!
Prayer
Father, I thank you for being the best father anyone could ask for. Thank you for modeling yourself how we should parent our children: caring for their wellbeing more than being popular. Thank you for caring enough to correct me, and for sending friends who do the same. I know that if you didn’t love me, you would leave me to my own desires. I am forever grateful for a God who gives me what I need over my feelings. Today I love You more than wanting to have my own way.
